How do I write down all the pain and frustration that I’m dealing with right now without sounding like I’m whining.

I can’t.

So, I’m just going to give a fly-by view of my day.

Woke up around 7:00a. This was actually a little later than I’ve been waking up now that I’ve moved back in with my parents. I did not make this move without a certain amount of “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO”. However, it is for the purpose of making my parents’ lives a little easier (read that as “making my mom’s life easier”. .dad doesn’t have a clue). I try to give myself about 20 minutes of “wake-up” time, but it’s kind of difficult when you’re sleeping in the same room as your mom.

Made the pot of coffee (hazelnut). Decided that I would cook a BIG breakfast, mainly because there was bacon in the fridge that needed to be eaten. PLUS we had exactly THREE croissants left over. So, eggs, bacon, and croissants, with guava jelly. Nice.

Dad is currently stuck on the idea that someone is coming to swap our van for a new one. As he has the habit right now of opening the doors (ALL of them, including the automatic one), I’ve now had to start locking the doors to both the van and my car. This has become a HUGE frustration because now I’m a horrible person because the man who’s coming to swap the vehicles can’t get into the car to  move it out of the garage.

After breakfast, I fed the dogs, and made a grocery list. Mom was supposed to go with me to Wal-Mart, but she’s dealing with pressure sores and an upper respiratory infection. Is it weird that the idea of going to the store by myself is exciting for me?

Dad keeps coming in accusing me of being stupid and a plethora of other really nice words.  At dinner time he was excited that I had been fired from the church, because evidently I deserved it. Said he wasn’t going to eat anything that I cooked and that he was going to stay the hell away from me. IF ONLY.

By the way, I haven’t been fired, there is NO ONE coming to swap the vans, there are no little black poodles/chihuahuas down at the trailer I used to live in, and on and on and on.

I told him I didn’t care if he starved. He said I was a D*** B****.

Only took the time it took for me and mom to eat our dinner for him to change his tune and eat the meal I had served up for him.

I’m having a hard time now not drowning my sorrows in sugar and alcohol.

I did get an aquarium. Haven’t gotten the fish yet.